n Open Letter to all the Human Beings Out There. No specific age, no
specific gender, no specific race, no specific sexual orientation, no
specific religion, no specific socioeconomic status. No, just…humans.
There’s an epidemic in our culture these days and it is really
disheartening.
Most of it is unwarranted and unprovoked. Most of it hides behind a
cloak of anonymity in the social networking universe which has engulfed
our generation. Some humans are hurt repeatedly for years without even
being able to recognize their attacker if they passed them on the
street. I am not talking about a specific hate crime here. I am talking
about a crime we are all both subjected to and part of at the same
time. I am talking about human-on-human crime. As a race, we humans
have this uncanny ability to be mean. Plain and simple…meanness is our
epidemic, and people are suffering every day.
Human-on-human crime has not been swept under the rug. Certain pains
have been categorized with others and activist groups have been formed
in hopes to bring to light the damage and emotional pain being committed
by humans, to humans. The most recent organization to come to my
attention is The Kind Campaign, which is an internationally recognized
movement, documentary and school program based upon the powerful belief
in kindness that brings awareness and healing to the negative and
lasting effects of girl-against-girl crime. The Kind Campaign, along
with other organizations, have made major strides to shed light on how
bad things have truly gotten behind the keys of a message board as well
as on the streets and in the classrooms across America.
In my opinion, at the bottom of all of these crimes, regardless of
their different wrapping, is this: humans can be superiorly mean. Humans
can be downright cruel. For years my mother would try to make me feel
better and tell me the girls who tormented me in middle school were
“jealous” and “insecure” and that was why they victimized me in the
lunch room. I love my mother, but she was wrong. Sometimes this meanness
has nothing to do with their insecurities or lives…sometimes, people
are just mean. Much like coldblooded murder, there can very well be
coldblooded meanness. Unprovoked, unwarranted meanness.
Now, when I attended middle and high school, things were different.
There was no real anonymity. I knew which girls wanted to see me cry. I
sat next to them in class. They would sign their names, first and
last, on their mean notes to me in-between periods. These days it’s
different. Like most diseases, human-on-human crime over time has
become stronger and has mutated into something we know exists, but are
still not sure how to fight successfully.
It’s scary nowadays. This world of anonymity has brought with it no
sense of accountability for words being said. So, in turn, the words get
sharper and more pointed, and they pierce the victim deeper.
There are some people who would rather die at the age of 13 than live
their life. How sad is that? They want to die before they even have
really begun to live. This is how mean humans have become. Kids with
bedtimes and babysitters are having real suicidal thoughts when this is
supposed to be the most carefree time of their lives. Instead of their
parents seeing them grow up into young adults, some are cutting their
children down from the rope they find their child hanging from in their
bedroom closet.
Regardless of the target group, human-on-human crime in general needs
to stop. It is causing irrevocable destruction to lives and mental
well-beings. And for what? What pleasure do we get out of hurting
another person? I am no saint. I have been a victim, yes, but I have
been on the other side of the hurtful whisper as well – I have hurt
people I simply can’t live without- but I have done more good than bad
in this life, and I make an honest effort to try to do good every day.
My middle school days are far behind me. I have wonderful friends and
a ridiculously close family. However, just recently, I have once again
become a target of someone’s unwarranted meanness. Unlike most attacks
these days, I know who my attacker is. I once considered him a good
friend.
I turned 27 this year and I found myself in a really bad space. While
everyone around me wanted to celebrate my life on my birthday, I found
myself, for the first time ever, wondering if the world would be a
better place without me. I find myself coming across his internet
bashings and wondering why I am still dealing with this as I am
closing-in on my 30’s. I find myself wondering if the world would be a
better place without the humans who purposely do harm to other humans.
The answer is no, the world would not be a better place without these
people. It would be a better place, though, if those people were a
little bit nicer.
On average, as a species, we get a measly 79 years on this planet. If
we are lucky. Do you realize how short that is in the scheme of
things? And though our time here is limited, we have the ability to
inflict pain and damage. Wouldn’t you want to “inflict” empowerment
instead?
Battling human-on-human crime with kindness is an uphill battle. We
may be just as far in as we will ever be out. I am sure that even as I
am writing this there are people still being hurt by words, people
crying themselves to sleep, people hating on this letter. I believe that
as much as we are the problem, we can also be the solution. Meanness is
an epidemic and it is unraveling the chances of us living a supremely
fulfilled life.
I ask that you share this open letter if you are going to make a
conscious effort each day to be a little bit nicer. Share this open
letter if you will make an honest effort to do something as simple as
just “shaking it off” when the barista in the morning messes up your
morning coffee. Share this open letter if instead of using the internet
to hurt someone, you will use it to empower people and share the
beautiful things in your life.
Life is short – spend your time here wisely. And just be nice to people.
Love,
Alicia Cook
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